Dating Has Rules?

Dating Has Rules?

Safety First

We live in a world very different from that of our great-great grandparents. A hundred years ago, most people knew their neighbors, the boy next door asked you out, and if you did have sex on a date, you were probably going to get married anyway. Today, we probably don't know our next door neighbor's first names, hookups are common, and the boy next door is probably dating the other boy next door.

With a world this different, you must have safety rules. The number one rule, of course, is knowing about STDs and how to prevent them – and to have the necessary tools – condoms, note the plural – in case a situation requiring them comes up. No pun. Really.

This goes for both men and women. Ladies, the day of the condom-scar on wallets is over. You need to be prepared yourself, and the best part is, you don't have to worry about the circular burn-in on your purse.

Other safety concerns include whose home sex may take place in; what neighborhoods you're going to go through; and who is driving whom. Women often feel safer if they take a separate vehicle, or if they do the driving. Men, let them.

No Really Means No

It's sad that women still have to emphasize this, but when a girl says no, that's it. No appeal, no pleading, and yes, she really means it. If she's drunk, discretion is the better part; don't have sex with her because she is incapable of saying no. This is rape.

Transportation and Choosing A Place To Go

Sometimes the logistics are the worst part of figuring out what to do. You will both need transportation to wherever you're going; separate cars are fine, or you can agree to meet on public transit, or you can simply walk to your destination. The transportation logistics should be determined by the woman, as she's the one who may not feel safe. If she's having trouble deciding, the man can go ahead and suggest.

As for choosing a place to go, the person who asked the other out should suggest a destination. The other party in the date has veto power over this, and can counter-suggest; typically, men will agree while women may not.

Who Pays?

Again, the person who asked the other out should offer to pay. This is just good manners in general. If the other party does not agree, you can split the check. Under no circumstances should the person who was asked out expect to pay for the whole thing; if you want to pay for the date, suggest that ahead of time, or ask the other person out on a second date for which you will pay.

Traditional Roles

There is a terrible myth that women don't want men to open doors for them. That is, in general, nonsense. If you want to open her door, by all means do. Do NOT order for her, unless you're in a restaurant where she does not speak the language, you do, and she is clearly out of her depth and uncomfortable with it. At all times, treat women like ladies. Give her a date she'll brag to her friends about the next day!